A blitzkrieg of buffoons

I've indulged to excess, I can take no more, at least this day. I simply cannot contemplate and proceed to rap out said contemplation on merely the latest blockbuster buffoonery of Donald Trump — even though he's front, center and the most mentally assbackward soldier in the "Grand" Old Party's volunteer army of blitzkrieging buffoons.

So no thoughts, just his Truth Social Wednesday gibberish, in severely reduced form (you're welcome): Ukraine's President Volodymyr Zelensky is a "Dictator"; he "talked the United States of America into spending $350 Billion Dollars" — $119 billion, actually — "to go into a War that couldn’t be won"; now "his Country is shattered, and MILLIONS have unnecessarily died"; no mention of who the shattering killers are, though he worked in "millions"; "We are successfully negotiating an end to the War with Russia, something all admit only 'TRUMP,' and the Trump Administration, can do" — rather, would.

Yet even that mountainous heap of bizarre rhetorical inventions crowned with dictatorial projection fail to top what he blathered the day before. Speaking to reporters and referring to President Zelensky, Trump said "You should have never started [the war]." Words fail too. You probably had already read his upside-down Baghdad Bob cynicism. Nonetheless I had to get it down for the record, another activity entry in the GOP's muster of blitzkrieging jackasses.

As for others among the hee-hawers of lightning-war fatuity, fellow one-dim-bulb and singular five-star Generäl Trümp's top lieutenants are, almost unbelievably, elected members of the U.S. House of Representatives. Strike that. Their placements in somewhat high stations were once nigh unbelievable to our former republic's citizens of prudence. No longer, not since unprecedented buffoonery morphed into electability's calling card. Upon presenting it, the aspiring GOP pol, wearing big floppy shoes, squirts psychotropic water from his or her chest into slackjawed faces of Amerika.

Take New York state's Rep. Claudia Tenney — please. She hasn't a clue as to how cringeworthy she is; why we grimace when encountering the kind of insipid, self-abasing Donald-fawning she's selling. The following you have read as well, most likely. But, you know, record-keeping.

The congresswoman introduced legislation last Friday titled the "Trump’s Birthday and Flag Day Holiday Establishment Act." The bill would "permanently codify” June 14 as a federal holiday, that titled “Trump’s Birthday and Flag Day." Miss Claudia reflected — brace for some altogether unbelievable rot — "Just as George Washington’s birthday is codified as a federal holiday, President Trump’s birthday should also be celebrated to recognize him as the founder of America’s Golden Age." Sorta leaves you speechless, no?

This duly elected and possibly hashish-smoking rep from NY's 24th congressional district is not alone in proffering such degrading silliness. Other parliamentarians of Tenneyesque obsequiousness have proposed that the always snarling visage of Trümp I/George Washington II/George III be carved into Mount Rushmore ... that airport, "Dulles," takes the Golden Age founder's name ... that the Band of Buffoons' generäl (hard g) should and

Andy

must be allowed a third term. Because? Writes the legislation's Rep. Andy Ogles, his "decisive leadership stands in stark contrast to the chaos, suffering, and economic decline Americans have endured over the past four years" in President Biden's world No. One economy.

About this collective idiocy I can do no better than Johns Hopkins political economist Filipe Campante. On Bluesky — where you can also follow this site (I'm beggin' ya; I abandoned hundreds of Twitter followers — he posted: "The reason why this is bad is the very fact that it’s transparently ridiculous: it shows how this is becoming a Kim Jong-Un-style cult of personality, where the sycophants try to outdo one another in their groveling to get the attention of Dear Leader."

A behemothic mystery how anyone could ever outdo the North Korean assmosis of the afore-cited Rep. Ogles, who also writes that Trump-Jong-Un "has proven himself to be the only figure in modern history capable of reversing our nation’s decay and restoring America to greatness." Modern U.S. history spans Reconstruction to present, thus we have the additional absurdity of out with FDR and the rather notable things he did. But, that's according to professional historians, not the water-squirting clown.

Nor is the Tennessee congressman's hagiographic laboring complete. Once he learns that real-deal Kim invented the hamburger, somewhat remarkably never needs to use the toilet and he cured Aids, Ebola and cancer, I've no doubt he'll up his buffoonery.